This challenge is fucking stupid. Good Start.

Well this is for two people. “Best” isn’t an easy thing to state in any situation.

Dear, my best friends.

….

We don’t talk like that. Hang on …

Ok.

…

Oi fuckheads!

Hows things mateys? The internet told me to write a letter to the two of you so here I am, wasting my time for no fucking reason, while I could be having a wank. I know right?

I have nothing much more to say in this letter than I’ve told you in those late drunken nights. Nope. Nothing. You know how much I dislike the both of you and how I can’t wait to stick your bodies in the ground so I can freely fuck your sisters.

I’d be pretty lonely without you guys though, so please wait untill I’ve found replacements ‘till you kark it.

Cheers,

The Most Miserable Cunt